Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
