im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
