I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
