Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀