he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.