I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize