I bet he comes in French.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
