chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
