Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
COCAINE IS GR8
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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