she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
There's always time for handjobs
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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