hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
