vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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