I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
