I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
