Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
