sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
