I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
We are all done wearing pants today
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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