everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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