@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I wish you could order shots online.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
