My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
