i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
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