Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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