so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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