I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
You took a bar mat shot.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
