he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
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This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
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and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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