I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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