But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Randomize
