The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
