I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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