i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
