I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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