I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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