No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
