i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Randomize