i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize