yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Farmville is her only friend.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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