How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Randomize
