kristin has been a bad kristin
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
