we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Randomize
