i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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