I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
