Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
