No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
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I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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