I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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