Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
