He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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