I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
