i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
