So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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