Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
