you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
